May 01, 2025

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The burden of big breasts

Cleavage, cleavage!" my aunt roared when my dupatta released, revealing my perfectly preserved, blousesecured boobs. Come to think of it, a liberal display of the waist is absolved--sari not sorry--but the littlest of skin-show above the waist falls under scrutiny. The dichotomy is deplorable. But it is what it isYou see, my plums matured into melons sooner than expected; I'd hit puberty at 10--the first in my grade--which likely catalysed hormone-induced growth, leaving me with a bra far bigger than that of my peers…and a befitting moniker, "Double D"So it wouldn't be a stretch to assume that my blossoming womanhood was stirring feelings of self-consciousnessIn a bid to tone down my tatas, I'd conceal them with loose-fitting clothes, pull out of 5Ks and even saunter, for I thought a bouncing rack was unsightly. All--and I mean all--that it'd take to draw away attentionTurns out, I wasn't alone. According to Women's Health (Lond.), mature-aged women with larger breasts express a desire to change their breast size, and are less satisfied with their bra fit. Now, it's only fair to ask: What of the men? Does this sentiment extend to our male counterparts, too? Findings in the Archives of Sexual Behaviour suggest that men who tend to engage in short-term, lowcommitment relationships are far more attracted to large breasts than those who engage in long-term relationships with high emotional commitment. Who would've known. And to think that the voices in my silence almost had me sign up for a breast reduction surgery a couple years ago… Bosom, boobs, tits, call it what you may, they're a heavy weight to carry. And with a steady gaze on DDchests, stashing away your voluptuousness may be the sole route to safeguard your self-esteemFolded arms soon became my perpetual pose, and a crew neck my preferred style. Throw in some back pain, the trading of push-ups for shapewear, and sturdier fabrics for better support into the mix, and you've got yourself a winnerNo pretty bras for big-boobed girls either! We renounce lace and tulle for stocky straps and underwire. Meanwhile, padded brassieres create the illusion of a fuller chest, so not a chance in hellBut I will say, the right bra, with the right fit--ever so slightly embellished; just a tad--can be life-changingYou see, it's a vicious cycle, an endless loop to downplay the chest. But the interventions only go as far as the mirror allows mercyIt was time to come clean. To come to terms with my body, my realityThe shame, the embarrassment; my impaired self-worth needed to be addressed. How? Positive self-talk, self-compassion, and surrounding myself with like-minded folks And so, my plunging neckline pledge--as I'd liked to call it--kicked off with an evening run (as the sun sets, so do the unsolicited stares). This was accompanied with a calorie deficit (crash diets won't do you any good), ample hydration, and a sound, eight- hour sleep. Ngl, it all helped downsize the rack, but the real work had to be done on an emotional level I couldn't escape the piercing male gaze, the prying eyes, fleeting glances via the rear-view mirror...even so, I was learning to love my body You know, there's something undeniably sexy about curves that command attention--the right kind, of course. One button down and your cleavage can turn a T-shirt into a statement...and leave a man aching for more. The quiet defiance of donning what you desire, in lieu of dressing to disappear I didn't need to contour my boobs, or resort to inserts. I was saving up on double push-up bras, too (yep, that's girl math for you). I was, finally, reclaiming the narrative Having big breasts exemplifies the weight of being constantly seen; the tightrope between "not enough" and "too much". There's vulnerability.. it's quite liberating They may be saggy, misshapen, seemingly ginormous...but they're mine all the same My bra strap had turned into a symbol of empowerment, and I refused to be sexualised without consent

Can your vibrator double as a face massager?

A few years ago in college, I was wandering through the lanes of Churchgate, heading toward the iconic stretch of booksellers, ready to splurge my hard-earned internship stipend on as many cheap books as I could carry. But on the way, I noticed something unexpected. In a shady lane not far from Kitab Khana, a couple of vendors were casually selling vibrators and similar toysWhat really struck me was the packaging--each one labelled as a massager. The euphemism was obvious, a not-so-subtle attempt to sidestep the taboo still surrounding female self-pleasureIt made me wonder--how would someone encountering this for the first time react? How safe is this, really? What if someone completely uninitiated picked one up, thinking it was just a regular back massager? Or worse, used it without any understanding of hygiene, safety, or proper usage? And who, exactly, is buying these off the street in the first place? This was in 2019Fast-forward to 2025, and there's a curious new trend in the beauty world that eerily echoes those lanes. People are using vibrators on their faces as massagers. Why? The reasons vary: Affordability, convenience, perceived effectiveness, and more. While this trend has been simmering in the West and is on the cusp of going mainstream, it's only a matter of time before it makes its way to the Asian beauty marketBack in 2021, Canadian adult toy brand We-Vibe launched Touch X, a "powerful mini massager" marketed as part of both your sexual wellness routine and your beauty regimen. At the time, Hypebae--a news and commerce platform--noted how the beauty and skincare community was using it to apply everything from makeup to serums, transforming it into a multi-use tool. But the question remains: Does it actually work like a face massager? "Vibrations, no matter the source, can boost blood flow, support lymphatic drainage, and relax muscles," says dermatologist Dr Manasi Shirolikar. That's essentially what a face massager is designed to do--stimulate circulation, reduce puffiness, and help products absorb better. And in theory, a vibrator-- though designed for an entirely different purpose--delivers similar benefits through its pulsations and movementSo, after doing my homework, I (very hesitantly) decided to give it a try. The Virgo in me, ever spiraling over hygiene concerns, couldn't bear the thought of using the vibrator lying in my cupboard. Instead, I got my hands on the g.s.t vibrator by Peppy. It's compact, sleek, and surprisingly easy to use on the face. Priced at `1,199, it felt like a reasonably pocket-friendly experiment. If you're not keen on buying a new one, you can use an existing vibrator--just be sure to disinfect it thoroughly (wash with warm water and mild soap, or use an alcohol-based sanitiser)For a week, I swapped my usual Gua Sha routine for this product. Typically, I'd apply Kimirica's Jojoba hair and skin oil to my face, follow it with a Gua Sha session (though I never quite remember the techniques), and then move on with my day. This time, I replaced it with the vibratorI used it in circular motions like any facial massager--under my eyes, along my jawline, on my neck, and over my forehead. This particular model lets you adjust vibration intensity, so I kept it at the lowest setting for comfort. And honestly, the vibrations felt incredibly relaxing--it worked like a